Well, this is pretty awkward but I’ll get right to it… I’m suing my rapist and I need your help (donating funds for my lawyer).
I’m an art model from Sacramento, California who has been working for artists all over California since 2009. The person in the photo is the one who has violated me many, many times and is continuing to do so under the guise of “art”. He is not allowed to use my likeness for anything, I have never given him permission to do so. A lot of the photos he has of me (making art with) I didn’t know that he had. But unfortunately I found out about who he really was a little too late.
I would like to obtain an attorney to proceed with court filings and whatnot. I want to be free of this person known as Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes from Grass Valley California (who is on Facebook Rambo Stillman and Phaedra Sea , @DanijoyDraws and @danijoyart on Instagram, and has changed his name to @adversarialexamples on Twitter) more than anything in the world. He’s already raped me before (forced sex as a way of “making up” after a fight), verbally abused me with anti-woman/anti-feminism comments (calling me a “feminazi” and putting me down for being a woman in general), constantly comparing me to other women (telling me I wasn’t good enough all the time), hit me (that’s when I left him), and pointed his loaded shotgun at me for fun every other day (which he purchased in his previous relationship and used on her for aggravated rape; there is a police report).
I have my police report already filed, now it’s time for the heavier lifting. I need your help to rid this person of my likeness that he is continuing to use as his “Jefferson’s Heiress” piece (and others) for BLM when in reality, he’s actually racist. Yeah, making fun of black hair and making racist jokes at your black girlfriend every single day isn’t very “pro-black”. So why make money from it? It needs to be dealt with.
I know it’s like CRAZY to hear… “this happened to her?“. Yes, it can literally happen to anyone. It doesn’t matter who you are. You can be the smartest, or the coolest, or the most successful, and still be vulnerable to someone emotionally attacking you constantly. Being in an abusive relationship is like being in a dark hole full of poison air but you keep looking up at the light above hoping that someday something will change, and it won’t. It will get worse. If I had stayed who knows what would have happened to me.
FULL STORY BELOW — SERIOUS TRIGGER WARNINGS AHEAD
LAST WARNING.. I’M SERIOUS… IT’S FUCKING BAD.
Some of you know me, most of you don’t. My name’s Sri and I’m an art model/band photographer/creator of MFKNZINE and I’ve had something heavy on my mind and in my heart for the passed 4 1/2 years. Over that time I’ve had minor outbursts about what had happened to me, but I couldn’t ever see it through. It was too much for me to handle, and I would have to retreat, push the feelings down, and hustle towards my dreams. I’ve come a long way but there’s that wretched feeling in my gut and I feel like I can’t push this secret down anymore. Over the course of COVID-19 during quarantine my PTSD became stronger, and much harder to deal with/ignore.
Between the course of 2014 to 2016 I was in an abusive relationship with a person named Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes from Grass Valley, California. He was cute, smart, funny, and very charming/charismatic. He loved to impress me by telling me about his accomplishments as a weed farmer, drag racer, and an artist who’s been to Burning Man several times. It was all good at first, until we became official. It started off as little things as progressed over time. Like going from glaring at me while I was laughing and texting with my BFF Angela, to calling us “a couple of dykes” because she bought me a ring with my birthstone for my birthday (and he got me nothing).
I messaged her about it…
I introduced him to BDSM and he seemed familiar with the term but didn’t know what it was all about. I explained that I wanted a Dom/sub kind of thing and he readily agreed. However, as I explained that the submissive was the one with the real power since they were able to say “no” whenever they felt uncomfortable etc, he protested. After going off on a rant about how BDSM was “bullshit”, I just kind of froze. I wasn’t sure what to say to that. It was the first of many, many red flags throughout our relationship. He hated that I was more of a “switch” (Dominant and submissive) rather than just a submissive. I wasn’t ever comfortable with him dominating me completely, but that didn’t stop him from trying.
Oftentimes he would call me a “slut” (as I’d try to play it off, but then I’d get upset), tell his friends that he was too busy to talk cause he was “balls deep” (not “deep” at all) in me, talk about ways he liked to fuck me to people I’ve just met with him (tried to play that off too). This was also when I first started going natural with my hair. As a black woman going natural for the first time it is so awkward. I didn’t know what to do with it but I tried my best with all the YouTube videos and tutorials (that I failed miserably). This was another opportunity for Daniel Grimes to degrade me. He would say my hair “looks like a poodle’s ass”. He would also make racist jokes at my expense. His favorite thing to do was to find ways to say “nigga” at me. He would always say “what’s up MoNIKKA”. My name is not Monica. He never told me he knew anyone named Monica. There was no “Monica”. He was being racist.
PRIME EXAMPLE CONVERSATION
Him calling me a “slut” and me trying to play it off before I start to get upset… (and proof of phone number)
Daniel Grimes never missed an opportunity to humiliate me, especially if there was an audience. I would say, “Dan!” and he’d just laugh at my sad expression. Not only did he degrade me, he degraded every woman he ever talked about. Told me the deepest secrets of his exes, called them all crazy (he kept saying “yeah, I like the ‘craizes’!” when talking about them), and constantly spoke poorly about all women in general. Any time I stood up, I was called a “feminazi”, and degraded even further. There was one he constantly discussed (I won’t reveal her name) who he said he had dated back when she was 16 and he was 32. He was always so adamant about how old she was when they started dating — like having someone that young be with you is cool. Looking back, the fact that I’m 10 years younger than him (and I look younger than my age) makes me wonder what that was about — like why does he keep dating seriously young girls? In any case, about the 16 year old who is now the barely legal ex, he kept telling me about how she was “fucking up her life” and how “clueless” she was about things — but he also would compare me to her, telling me to be like her. He liked to have us together to create tension and laugh at both of us being upset about the other.
At the time, I had been living with my mom and our relationship wasn’t so great so I’d come stay with him for days at a time. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve looked up to see myself staring down a loaded shotgun and yelled “WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TELL MY MOTHER?!”. He would laugh and put it away after that. Other times he’d punch himself directly in the face right in front of me. And of course I’d yell “Oh my God Dan!” and run to him to check his face. This happened way too often.
The loaded shotgun he used to wave at me is drawn in the background and the frame surrounding me is a bunch of shotgun shells. Again, I did not give him permission to make art of me, but being with him having a say was kind of out of the question.
This awful behavior was always balanced with him taking me on nature trips, cooking me food, letting me borrow his pink coat for FURCON2016, and keeping me stoned on the weed he grew. He did things for me that were great, sometimes he was nice and actually showed me his sensitive side, however if I didn’t show “enough” appreciation or spoke one word of constructive criticism I was met with his rage. I did my best to show my appreciation for these things, but it was never “good enough”. He would compare me to one of the exes he would talk crap about (which would always confuse me) and berate me to tears. At which point he would then console me and then tell me he would be better and how sorry he was. He would always, always tell me that he was going to try to find a therapist and get some help for his anger issues. He did not go to therapy.
More than a few times he wanted to talk about his father and how awful he was. As a girlfriend (or just a human being who cared), I would offer to listen to his stories about his dad pulling a gun on him and his whole family on a constant basis. I immediately connected that to what he was doing with me and he said, “I know”. After his father died the relationship grew more abusive, and I felt guilty for wanting to leave him so I stayed. He often spoke of his dad during this time, mostly about how he hated him and how his father used to pull a gun on him and his family. The yelling, abusiveness — it all sounded familiar. It also sounded shocking since I had just met his dad not that long prior to him being sick, but I was there to listen anyways — until things took a turn.
Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes AKA “Rambo Stillman” talking about his dad, the violence, his own personal control issues with women, inner-issues he took out on other people (women), “living behind a mask” and “not showing his true self”, carrying the torch of abusive behavior from his father (and THEN some) all in one post on Facebook:
The last time I saw Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes was July 18th, 2016.
By that point I had started art modeling in the bay area to prepare for us moving there. His literal plan was to buy a van and live out of it with a bucket and kitty litter as a toilet. The worse part about that is that I was kind of down but trying to negotiate an actual apartment instead of a van and cat litter. I must have been out of my fucking mind. Thinking about it again, looking back at that — sounds ridiculous as hell. While I was on my grind in the bay making money and looking for an apartment for us he was up in Grass Valley. I had came back up from Oakland cause he told me he had hurt his ankle, and it was swollen but he had an errand to run that day. I got in my car and drove to GV nonstop and landed at the grocery store to pick up food to cook for dinner that was good for inflammation (swelling). Got there, put the food up, took off for the errand, came back and made dinner while he was laid up. I was so tired I only half assed made my plate, but I fully made his. This doesn’t sound like a couple that’s about to get into a raging argument that ended in violence — but it is.
We were having one of those arguments about him thinking I’m cheating (he always accused me of this even though I never did, but he was). I don’t remember how it got started, but what I DO remember was him pointing a long butcher knife at me while he was yelling at me (cooking). I backed into the bathroom and immediately thought “this is how I’m going to die? In this disgusting bathroom?”. I felt like the woman in the horror film everyone was yelling at to fight, or run. But the truth is you can’t. You’re fucking scared. So you back away, and put your hands up, and freeze. I was let out of the bathroom when he put the knife away.
I was on my way to Oakland that night but I wanted to calm him down before I left. He didn’t like me being gone and he had always accused me of cheating (I actually caught HIM cheating on me with that ex he dated when she was 16 and he was 32), but since I started working in the bay it had gotten worse. So I was trying to figure out what went wrong in the conversation we had while I was gathering my things and it escalated into him hitting me — twice. The first time I looked at him confused/angry. The second time I just held my face and said “how could you?”.
He then tried to physically throw me out of the warehouse through the office door entrance without my shoes on. I yelled “AT LEAST LET ME GET MY STUFF!”. He put me down, and I grabbed EVERYTHING down to the sex toys and the 1 year anniversary ring I got him (which he never wore). When I grabbed the toys he said “what do you need THOSE for?” and I replied, “they go in ME, what are YOU going to do with them?”. I packed it all and got in my car. And I just sat there. I watched him lock the door and I took off for Oakland. I was numb the whole ride, until I got to Oakland’s city limits. I just burst into tears. I almost couldn’t see. It was 1am and I had to get up after a quick nap in my car, but sleep wouldn’t come. I kept waking up every hour, remembering what had happened, cried, smoked weed to pass out and fell asleep only to do it again 60 minutes later.
At my gig I was numb, but I did my job regardless. Then I got a text from him saying, “Did you make it to work on time?”. That’s it. Not “I’m sorry”. Not “Are you okay?”. I didn’t reply. In the coming weeks he would harass me on social media and email by using my hashtag #srimfknsherrell on his Instagram posts that were either old, dug up drawings of me, or “confession” style posts about me (which are now deleted but I have the shots to prove it).
There was even one about Aftershock (I go every year and he knows that) saying “#herekittykitty” (what he used to say to me). The emails were worse. At first he was trying to arrange for me to send him a knife he let me borrow to protect myself in the bay area. Then he started talking about taking on these trips all over the world and spending our lives together. Finally, it turned dark when he said he was going to put one of his guns in his mouth. I only deleted them one by one as he used different email addresses to communicate with me as I blocked them all.
After he realized I was blocking him and not responding to his “efforts” he started getting ugly online calling me “insane” and “narcissistic” as abusive people do. He also rewrote captions that had me as the photo on Instagram or just deleting photos of me altogether… but Twitter never deleted or changed it (oops!).
I saved the worst for last cause I didn’t think I could even talk about what had happened but… when he raped me it was his way of having “make up sex”. He would pick fights, or just be horrible to me etc and I’d want to talk about it rather than have sex and just move on only to have it happen again.
I remember him inviting me up to “talk” and right when I get there he’d be all over me and I’d push him off saying “we need to talk”. That would enrage him. There were times he physically took my clothes off as I was trying to talk and slap his hands when they grabbed at me.
This was May 9th 2016
I remember him being on top of me and I was just staring off to the right looking at boxes. I didn’t want to look at him. I was laying there dead. Not moving. Not alive. I didn’t want it. But he took it anyways because we were “together” it was okay cause we were “making up”. There was a time where either we had to have sex or I had to “get out”.
I texted my BFF about it the next day…
The absolute worst time Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes raped me was when he was kind of staying at his mom’s boyfriend’s trailer who had just passed away. Again, I had come up to talk about what we were fighting about cause the texting was making it worse. As soon as I walked in he grabbed me by my hair and dragged me into the bedroom. He then tied me spread eagle to the bed after he hooked my collar (I usually wear a spiked dog collar) to something he rigged on the bed. I laid there yelling “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?” as I grabbed at the back of my collar to try and unleash myself from it but it was so tight it choked me and I couldn’t get loose. As I struggled with that he had ripped my lower half nude, had my legs tied spread and then grabbed my arms to tie them up too. So I had to lay there tied up and choking. Then he reached for a camera and just started taking photos. I remember the flash going off. I felt humiliated. I started crying uncontrollably while choking out the word “stop”. He did not stop. He then took the flash off and continued to take more photos of me. After that, he walked over to the nightstand where he had an array of knives that I hadn’t seen when he dragged me into the room. I started crying more. He seemed to enjoy it. He took one of the serrated knives and ran it across my leg and I started screaming. He then told me to “calm down”. After that he attempted to eat me out and I felt nothing. He wasn’t particularly good at it, but this time I literally felt nothing. My body was numb. He entered me shortly after while repeatedly asking me “who do you belong to?”.
I left the next day crying and confused. To him it was just another day. I didn’t know what had just happened or what to do. But I told my BFF Angela about it (I have the shots), and reading it again, I was clearly confused and distressed.
THE ABOVE is what he is claiming to be consensual sex. He’s claiming because I’m into kink, I asked for him to rape me. However my past sexual history would fuck THAT up in court, and no where on my Fetlife profile does it say that I’m into being tied up and “consensually raped”. I’m not even a sub/slave. I’m a dominant Mistress. This makes no sense.
So that’s what happened and I’m currently suing Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes aka Rambo Stillman (Facebook) who is using my likeness for a BLM art piece entitled “Jefferson’s Heiress” which was something my mother told me about our family as slaves. I don’t think it’s right that a racist rapist artist is making money off of BLM artwork while the movement is at it’s peak and taking advantage it. Mind you he had those unsanctioned photos for years and all of a sudden he’s pro-black (unless you look at his Facebook). He was not pro-black when we were together, and he’s certainly not now.
His Facebook post on the first day of Black History Month 2021 and another BLM-related post on FB that “no one sees” VS his PUBLIC statements on BLM via his real name on Twitter:
I have since moved to Los Angeles, California.
Thanks to everyone for keeping me strong and confident enough to go through with this. And a HUGE thank you to everyone who has donated so far. Please share this and help me make the art community in Grass Valley, California a lot safer. He’s also been seen in Sacramento and in the Bay Area.
This is being shared throughout the art community online. If you fear you may be friends with this person on social media her are his links so you can unfollow/unfriend him:
Facebook 2 (finally got the “Phaedra Sea” account link)
Art Studio in GV (MAIN STUDIO)
Proof of ILLAGAL sale of my likeness:
Me slowly coming out about this one article at a time…
Listened to Amenra’s Album and it changed my life
5/4/21 — Since I’ve come forward about what he did to me.. other people have been coming forward about what he did to THEM.
5/11/21 — MORE…
5/27/21 UPDATE: Now he’s gaslighting and saying that all of the people above aren’t real (lol seriously? okay) and they’re pissed the fuck off. Now they have given me permission to show their faces cause they’re sick of his shit. Some have chosen not to, and I don’t blame them at all (I wouldn’t either if he threatened to find, kill and eat me). Out of respect, they will stay censored.
Permissions of the UNcensored (updated 5/27/21):
5/27/21 — MORE people coming forward…
5/27/21 UPDATE — I was sent this screenshot from someone who had messaged him on Instagram about this. He’s trying to claim that just because I’m into kink that I asked for him to rape me…. un-fucking-believable. As for proof that I gave consent for him using my images to make money? — never happened. You know how I know that? Cause I would have negotiated a contract. I make a living from art modeling and my own image, of course I would have wanted a cut if he’s going to use me as his muse for money. However, I never agreed to that. Not verbally. Not on paper. Not anywhere, ever. As for these “activists [he’s] pissed off”, I don’t know them and this sounds deranged. Especially since the “photoshopped people” have been coming forward uncensored and are actual people who have agreed to be in court to testify against him. I can’t photoshop that. Also, I work as an art model. And whatever money I don’t have for rent or food I’ve asked my mom to help (lol sorry mom). So the whole ” her GoFundMe is a scam” bit doesn’t hold water.
5/29/21 UPDATE — He (Daniel “Dani Joy” Grimes) has reactivated his 2nd account on Facebook in order to add and message me on my abandoned “Katie Fitch” account (the one I used to get screenshots of his weird Facebook rants about women, violence, etc and find witnesses for my lawyer without putting myself in danger). So it looks like after being banned from Nevada City Peeps’ FB group he has “infiltrated all [the] local groups with pseudo anonymous A.I. accounts [he] programmed based off [Nevada County’s] public posts”. Screenshots posted below.
IG Post About The Phaedra Sea Account:
IG Post About The message/FR from him on FB:
5/31/21 UPDATE — A female artist came forward through @grimecrimesgv on Instagram and told me about when he harassed her for a date via Instagram, and then sexually harassed her with a nude photo when she just wanted to attend one of his art classes. She wants to stay anonymous, but has agreed to testify if need be.
6/17/21 — UPDATE: His Twitter Account has been found. He has changed his name to “Adversarial Example”.
7/24/21 — Again, trying to add me on social media (IG this time) under a different name, but he changed it AFTER he added me so I saw it lol… (seriously?). Check my block list on my main account — before and after.
To anyone who donates, thank you, THANK YOU sooooo much. One less shackle on this chain. I know times are crazy, and very difficult and I appreciate whatever you can offer and I’ll do my best with whatever I get. I need this more than anything.
Litecoin (LTC): MJ5vCPCC7okCUSxtzpoagLB4Pi2Er2izZe
Bitcoin (BTC): 34skfhFaPg9nZ3nM8EHxCwaKFZDq6jRskX
Ethereum (ETH): 0xB6E4c7c8B79c0824De14E8C9A16Ed60960fA130c
ALSO! Please email firstname.lastname@example.org from ASIF Studios in Grass Valley, California to let them know about this artist!
ANOTHER THING: He was featured on Good Morning Sacramento back in 2018. Might want to email them this article.
Thank you so much for your time!